I just got home from a Bible study written by Beth Moore about peace. It was really eye-opening to realize how much of my life has been spent in "keeping the peace" as opposed to being a "peace maker". Being at the core of my person a relatively non-confrontational being, so much of my life as a wife and mother has been spent keeping a lid on situations that if I had just let the Lord deal with it immediately, my life and those in the middle of my world would have been better too. Her premise is that peace keepers have two motivations for their actions, fear and distrust. How true that has been for me.
I'd like to think that in the past few years I've learned a few lessons, and I think I have, but I do see the absolute truth in her naming those as primary motivators, at least for me. I have always felt that if I kept things calm, I could eventually fix anything that was happening. How incredibly arrogant of me! A quote from Mrs. Moore "fear keeps us in turmoil, that is no way to live." How true, how true.
Anyway, today I'm praying that I will allow God to deliver me from my fears and distrust and begin to walk in His peace, His light, His love for me and mine.